RogerBW's Blog

That British Memeplex 16 August 2015

I got this from History Monk. This is the earliest place I've found it.

1. Marmite- love or hate?

I don't know about love, but I quite like the stuff. Goes very well with grated cheese as a sandwich-filling.

2. Marmalade- thick cut or thin cut?

Thick, usually, but I don't much mind.

3. Porridge- made with milk or water?

Milk.

4. Do you like salt, sugar or honey on your porridge?

Usually salt, occasionally sugar. Depends on my mood.

5. Loose tea or teabags?

Loose, usually; they don't make gunpowder teabags.

6. Where on your door is your letterbox?

In the middle.

7. What's your favourite curry?

Varies with whim; I like enough heat to taste, not enough that it's a genitalia-measuring contest to eat it.

8. What age is the place where you live?

1930s originally, extensively modified.

9. Where do the folks running your local corner shop come from?

Indian subcontinent by appearance, quite possibly "round here".

10. Instant or fresh coffee?

No thanks.

11. How far are you from the sea?

60-ish miles, from the Thames Estuary or Worthing.

12. Have you travelled via Eurostar?

No. Took Le Shuttle by accident once, when I didn't know the bus was going to be using it. I have read the fire safety plans for that tunnel ("drive really fast and hope for the best").

13. If you were going to travel abroad, where's the nearest country to you?

France.

14. If you're female (or possible even some males) do you carry a handbag?

No, though I almost always wear a heavily-pocketed waistcoat, and have a briefcase, bag or satchel when I need to carry more.

15. Do you have a garden? What do you like growing?

We have a meadow. Wildflowers.

16. Full cream, semi skimmed or skimmed?

Whole. ("Full cream", I suppose.) Anything else tastes "off", even though I was brought up on skimmed without the option.

17. Which London terminal would you travel into if going to the capital?

Marylebone.

18. Is there a local greasy spoon where you live?

Alas, no. Local Chinese and fish and chip places aren't bad, and there are sometimes decent takeaway vans in the market in High Wycombe, but no low-end dining-in establishment that I've found.

19. Do you keep Euros in the house?

Not as policy, but rather than convert them back to real money and pay twice, yes.

20. Does your home town have a Latin, Gaelic or Welsh alternative?

No, just Anglo-Saxon.

21. Do you have a well known local artist or author?

Probably. I don't do "well known".

22. Do you have a favourite Corrie character?

Um? Oh, Coronation Street. Never watched it. Why isn't there a question about The Archers?

23. Are your kitchen sink taps separate or a mixer?

Mixer, plus filtered/unsoftened.

24. Do you have a favourite brand of blended tea?

No.

25. What's in your attic if you have one?

CDs and DVDs, mostly. And too many water tanks.

26. If you go out for a cream tea, what jam do you like on your scone?

Given the choice, raspberry.

27. Talking of scones- scon or scown? Jam or cream first?

Scon. Jam first, or the cream gets mashed in.

28. Barth or bath? 29. Carstle or castle?

Pronunciation? -ar-.

30. What flavour of crisps do you favour?

Varies with mood, probably cheese and onion.

31. If you go to the chippie, what do you like with your chips?

Mayonnaise. I'm a pervert.

Or if you mean as a main course, cod or haddock.

32. Take away, take out or carry out?

Take away.

33. If you have one, what colour is your wheelie bin?

Black, green and blue. For now.

34. What colour skips does your local skip hire use?

Mostly yellow, I assume; at least that's what ends up in front of houses round these parts.

35. Do you celebrate Guy Fawkes?

Formerly, professionally. Not so much these days.

36. Dettol or TCP?

No.

37. Do you have a bidet in the bathroom?

No.

38. Do you prefer courgettes or aubergines?

Courgette, but only if properly prepared. (Sliced, then fried in garlic butter, for example.)

39. In the 'real world', do you have friends of other nationalities? Which nationalities?

Yes. French, German, Spanish, Australian, USAnian, Canadian, Singaporean…

40. Do you have a holy book of any sort in the house?

Yes, several. I practice memetic self-defence.

41. Do you prefer a hankie or tissues?

Tissues.

42. Are you a fan of crumpets? What do you like on them?

Yes. Usually just butter, though marmite also works.

43. Doorbell, knocker or both?

Doorbell, though it's unreliable and I need to buy or build a better one.

44. Do you own a car? What sort?

҆koda estate.

45. What sort of pants do you guys prefer? Y fronts or boxers?

Y-fronts.

46. Anyone still a fan of suspenders?

Decline to answer. Or are you an American and mean "braces", in which case not particularly.

47. Do you have a favourite quote from the bard?

No. Or yes. Depends on my mood.

48. Do you like toasted muffins?

Mildly, but I prefer crumpets.

49. Do you think a traditional trifle should contain jelly?

No strong opinion.

50. Do you attend regular religious worship? Of what kind?

No.

Tags: real life

  1. Posted by Owen Smith at 08:48pm on 16 August 2015

    I fail to see what this has to do with being British, there are a lot of questions that are simply inapplicable to either myself or my parents.

  2. Posted by John Dallman at 01:43pm on 17 August 2015

    It was clearly written by a non-Brit. As such, it's somewhat revealing about the minutiae they've encountered, and think we take seriously.

  3. Posted by RogerBW at 01:55pm on 17 August 2015

    If it were native I'd expect something about football, or at least sports in general, but the exact phrasing of the question would reveal a fair bit about the quiz-writer.

    (I quite like English Muffins, but I've only ever seen them in the USA; they're much more crumpety than muffiny.)

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