RogerBW's Blog

March-April 2017 Trailers 23 April 2017

Some trailers I've seen recently, and my thoughts on them. (Links are to youtube. Opinions are thoroughly personal.)

A Ghost Story: mental disintegration, I assume, though interestingly shot. Once I have some idea what the actual story is, this might appeal.

Don't Kill It: this could be an interesting exploration of whether the demon hunter is a nutter or in some way correct; but the trailer gives away the answer, so meh.

Paris Can Wait: the free jazz tells you what sort of film this is going to be. But is it just another film that might have been made in the 1970s with bonus food porn, or does it have something specific to say?

Ferdinand: are there people left who care about the book? Probably not, but it was a Known Marketable Property so Fox Animation bought it, attached bankable names, paid for some compute time to do the awfully generic-looking animation, and all the rest; there's no sense that anyone cared about this specific thing. And the release date has been juggled around until it's now planned to open on the same day as Star Wars VIII, which I'm sure made sense to somebody.

It: when Stephen King wrote the book thirty years ago, this kind of idea was vaguely unusual; now it's utterly standard and worn-out, which makes this the perfect time to feed the book into the Hollywood Genericising Machine.

Berlin Syndrome: you're blowing half the trailer on the setup that makes it look like Generic Romance Story, before you get to the actually interesting bit. Still, you don't appear to have much to say even in the interesting bit.

Believe: an Inspirational Story. The Jesus™ branding has been sanded off for this trailer, but really, all stories that say "all you need to do is believe" are the same story, whether they invoke explicit miracles or just say "everything's gonna be all right".

Despite The Falling Snow: can love overcome politics? Can the beautiful filmmaking overcome the narrative drag that inevitably comes from telling the story in flashback?

Hacker: those darn millennial immigrants, it's all their fault. Real Americans don't do this kind of thing. And no company or government ever does bad stuff.

The Book of Henry: being smart is another superpower. Smart people are Not Like Us.

War Machine: looks interesting, and the book had some positive reviews. On the other hand, Ben Kingsley's name attached to a film these days usually means it's rubbish. We'll see.

King Arthur - Legend of the Sword: there's nothing here for me. If you like sweaty men in armour bashing each other and lots of CGI, fair enough.

Annabelle - Creation: pre-chewed creepy spooky stodge with bonus jump scares. Oh, it's James Wan, no wonder.

The Mummy: boom bang explode, Tom Cruise, bad cover of Paint It, Black, oh this time the Mummy is a woman, explodey bang, more Tom Cruise, CGI London blows up, bored bored bored. Yes, all right, Britain is now much cheaper to film in, but do you have to bring your shit here?

All Eyez On Me: not really my thing, but I don't believe he was the revolutionary saint that this trailer makes him look like. Complicated people are more interesting, dammit!

Cézanne et Moi: Why does this leave me feeling flat and uninspired? I don't know. Maybe it's that line from the female accessory about her rival for His affections being painting rather than the female models; it's so clichéd that I fear for the rest of the film.

3 Generations: Good actors, and while this looks like a fairly standard Women's Story (why is it always and only about relationships?) it is at least the kind of story that doesn't often make it to the big screen.

Thor - Ragnarok (Teaser): All about the fighty. A trailer that grabbed me would have plot as well. But clearly the primary audience doesn't mind the lack of that.

Detroit: OK, clearly it needs to be said and said and said again, but is this too heavy-handed, too blatantly "all black men are wonderful, all white man are terrible"?

The Hitman’s Bodyguard: achieves the near-impossible of taking Samuel L. Motherfucking Jackson and making him boring. Another victory for Ryan "Charisma Vortex" Reynolds.

Disneynature's Dolphins: "honest, we don't chuck lemmings any more, how many of these things do we have to make before you forgive us?"

I Love You Both: what this trailer says to me is that romantic comedies are getting increasingly desperate to find some iteration of relationships that hasn't been done to death. So desperate that they're finally willing to admit that bisexuality is a thing!

Instant Death: it takes a dead woman to make a man be a man. And more dead and injured women to make a man who Doesn't Do That Any More do it one last time. With bonus background strippers who look as bored as I was.

American Assassin (Teaser): same old same old, crank the script-o-matic and drop in some new actors and hey, we've got a new film.

The Little Hours: yeah yeah yeah, sex comedy with nuns, and so…? Going by the trailer, this is that scene in an action film where a sweet old lady tells the hero to fuck off, done again and again until it gets to feature length. Good cast, though.

Wakefield: oh dear, when you abandon everyone, they learn to live without you, how terrible. Actually this looks as if it might have some potential.

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